Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly. - Robert Schuller.
This is my first blog of the day, how shocking, i fail at life so much today lol. It isn't even funny. I got up at 6 as usual and fed Justin and did the washing up and such and then i decided to go back to bed and then Ami rang me telling me she was on her way to mine so i was like urgh and i had to get up and then she got pulled over on the way to mine for escorting (it isn't as ad as it sounds but i can't explain because it isn't as hilarious then) so anyway then we left for ikea which is about 3 hours away from mine we got on the 94 all merry and then the 51 all merry and then the 334 all merry (though a bit scared i might bump into James, thankfully i didn't.) and then we couldn't find ikea, we spent about an hour looking for it, turns out it was right infront of us so as you can see the days been a sham right from the start, so anyway we finally managed to get into ikea and we have a look around, i went to change Justin and we carry on looking around with our merry little shoping list which we totally didn't understand and genuinely thought when it said "name" that it wanted our names, not the item name. (me and Ami are not very bright) but we finally managed to work that out and then all of a sudden all we can hear is some woman on the speaky thing saying "can Jessica Gill please come to the information desk at the front" and i was like OMG argh thats me and i was very confused and upset but turns out, i had lost my bag and it had my passport in it with my maiden name on it... So then after that sham we carried on shoping and we found a magical hippotomus that was green and stripy ut Ami would let me get him because she thought he scared Justin but he clearly didn't, Justin loved him, but we had the choice of three the hippotomus wqho was amazing, a water horse that was almost as amazing and an elephant that was cute and we were waving them all infront of Justin and he wasn't having any of it but we decided he seemed to like the water horse best and brought that, we've called him greg because Justins best sound at the moment seems to be "g" and greg has two g's in it. So that was all merry and then we just went around and did the shopping which was pretty usual nothing majorly out of the ordinary bar the fact that ikea is a very very very large place and we got very lost several thousand times but that is not important because it is expected, so then we went for something to eat and i was starving so i ate alot alot and then it was time to feed Justin, all merry only he decided to choke on his mashed potato and he actually turned blue so obviously i picked him up and patted his back until he coughed potato and milk all over my sholder which was unplesent to say the least but oh my god, i actually think that those few seconds in my life were the worst, ever, period. No doubt about it. Anyway Justin got better and we decided to go to the checkout, it took us about an hour to find that and then we realised we had to pick up all of the flat pack furni and take it to the check out so we spent far too long trying to get a trolly, then we found the cot and matress with not so much ease as well, erm, less effort than it took to find everything else and then we simply could not find anything else at all so we decided to use the merry touch screen "find it" computer, we broke it. So we sat in a corner crying hysterically hoping it would attract a member of staff to come and help us, keep in mind at this time it is about 4pm and we left mine just before ten! Then finally our amazing new friend the very tall chris something came to help and then he went away (before he helped but after we asked for help) and we cried and said "please don't leave us, please come back" we didn't think he would but he did, god bless him and he found us the sofa and the highchair in seconds and helped us get them onto the trolly and helped us over to the checkout and we paid and then i paid a whopping £30 for delivery, THIRTY POUNDS, daylight fucking robbery if you ask me! I'd already given them £120 simply for furni! (Yes i spent an amazing amount of money today) but yes, then we left and had a well deserved cigarette. We walked back up to the 334 stop which took forever and waited for the bus by this point we are both hysterical and suicidal and even Justin looks too depressed for life keeping in mind he had been in his pram literally all day bar when we took him out for food and about twenty mins when we took him out in the shop and i carried him around lol. The first bus came and it was a super old one with a pole in the middle so we couldn't get it and then another came about ten mins later spo we got on that and then had to literally run for the bus in walsall to take us to town and then i realised i had a tampon related emergency which i wont go into detials about but it was unplesent then we went to mcdonalds for some food and to feed Justin and then we got the ninety four back to mine and put Justin back to bed and well all i have to say is that ikea is both a strange and wonderful place to which i shall never return because it is the bane of my life. And oh no, the trauma dosn't stop there, we then decided to try and wax my legs, i am by the way the worlds biggest wimp and wimped out as per usual, problem being the wax was already on my bloody leg. It took Ami about 2 hours to finally pull it off and i genuinely think it was more painful than having my tattoo and more painful even than having Justin! lmao. That is pretty much my day so far, well, my sham so far and Mike is coming over shortly which will hopefully make my sham of a day less shambolic, but i doubt it, nothing can help.
On a brighter note, i do have a beautiful cushion.