Wednesday, 18 February 2009

There is nothing that makes its way more directly into the soul than beauty.

There is nothing that makes its way more directly into the soul than beauty. - Joseph Addison.

I haven't only just got up before you think that, i've been up since six but i thought i would do my tidying up before i blogged because i had a terrible mirgraine yesterday and couldn't do anything i didn't even go to my meeting i got back from chelmsley and just died lol. I went to bed at seven with Justin! lol. And to make my life even worse i woke up this morning genuinely thinking my womb had exploded because i've never had a heavier period in my life, thats a lie but you get the gist of it. lol. So yeah anyway, i got up and fed Justin as usual i've decided to just give him the full rusk in the mornings because well, he likes it. lol. I'm trying him on carrot later see if he likes that but if not he will have to have baby rice because i have no bananas left lol he's got the cutest little dungaree's on at the moment my adorable little boyy lol. Then i did the washing up and the cleaning and hung some clothes up to dry and put another wash load on including Mikes top, lolz. I've become obsessed with cooking and i'm not sure how or when it happened but i even brought the bbc's good food magazine yesterday i don't know why i bother because i don't have half the ingredients i need but i plan to buy some cupboard stuffs bit by bit and become the worlds greatest cook, or something like that anyway lol. I only cook at night mind, toast in the morning (or cereal or something equally quick and easy) some kind of sandwich/salad (or something equally quick and easy) in the afternoon and then i cook something super and nice at night, bar yesterday when i just had cheeseburgers because i was too ill to make a major effort to cook. But obviously don't really have much time to cook something nice in the day because Justin demands my attention the majority of the time hehe. I can't even have a shower until half ten which is abit of a bummer but hey. lol. I should really go out today and buy some bananas and some sanitairy towels but i can't leave mine on the account that i'm having to change every half hour! bummer. I've had to text most my mates asking if they're free to do me a favor today and if anyone says yes i plan to ask them to go to the shop for me lol. I'm actually DYING for a wardrobe because my clothes are everywhere and i'm getting really sick of it its actually depressing lol. My dads supposed to be taking me to ikea some time this week but it's pointless because i have no money and wont get my grant for another week or two i have asked him mind if he will lend me the money for a wardrobe but he hasn't text back yet which is fair enough because it is only half 8 lol. I'm not seeing Mike until saturday now and he has to leave mine early sunday :( lol. Ooooh i saw Kurtis yesterday lolz happy times i never see Kurtis lolz. haha i just remembered my wedding, i spent about twenty mins hugging Kurtis and telling him we should just go to mcdonalds lolz! Bored bored bored i hate having nothing to do. I'm going to get jimmy out in a bit but have to wait until Justin goes to bed because they don't get on (Jimmy is my vaccume cleaner) lol. Baby clinic tomorrow and swimming Friday think Lou's coming with me to both, funtimes. Ew, bollocks i'm going to be on on friday damnit. Well if last month is anything to go by i'll be off tomorrow but still lol. Paid my water and electric yesterday. :) I'm not looking forward to finding out what my phone bill is! :( After this month i'm only going to use my minutes in an emergency i think lol. I wish i didn't have flab and strech marks :'( lol shame, i don't have the bloody time to do anything about it either lol. I haven't had breakfast this morning! I'll have some cereal in a min. lol. Infact i'm going to make some now and have a cigarette while Justin sits happily in his lil orange swing :) lol. and as i go to get up justin starts moaning! My life is a mockery of a sham lol. Poor fella was squashing his own arm, lmao. Right i'm off for a little bit but will probably be back very shortly ttfn. :)

Justin got tired earlier than usual so i've put him down for a nap now instead. Hopefully he will wake up for his half ten bottle and also hopfully he won't do this this saturday because i have to have him at my dads for ten so James can pick him up. Oh deary me. lol. Usually he gets up at half six for his bottle and rusk and then lies all quiet and good (awake but resting lol) in his basket for about an hour then he gets up and plays until his bottle at half ten and then he sleeps until about 2 lol and obviously has his bottle and food at half 2 and so on until his bath, bottle and bed at 6 half 6 and seven lol. Anyway i don't know why i'm sat here blogging i'm going to have a cigarette, some breakfast and a shower and get dressed and do the vaccuming and if Justin is still in bed by the time i've finished (and it's not half ten) then i shall return to the world of the blog obsessed. :)

Back again at quater past ten. Sorry, it rhymed. lol. Justin decided he wanted his bottle at ten instead of half past which makes sense considering he didn't have all of his rusk this morning lol. I managed to get a shower atleast but i'm having a very bad week body imageyyy way. If that makes sense, if not i shall put it bluntly, i feel fat and ugly. LMAO. My life, ha. I'm going to blame the period and the fact that since having Justin i am even more stupidly allergic to most makeup. I have a mini farmfoods catalogue with vouchers. :) i got it in the post along with my gas bill which i plan to pay at some point today which involves me walking down to the cashpoint which takes the piss because i can pay it at the shop by mine but there's no cashpoint there! lol.
(8)i believe you can't appreciate real love till you've been burnt, i believe the grass is no more greener on the other side i believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye......
Music makes me happier lol. Justin has gone back to bed by the way lol. I'm wearing a random horrid ugly t-shirt but its annoying my neck because it's high but i can't get changed because i have nothing else to wear damn it. I look like an ugly spotty chubby man. Damn it. Hang on i think Justin's woken up. Yup. Okay well i guess he dosn't want to sleep today, strange child, he's only going to screem blue murder in half hour because he's fucking tired. grr. I'm having a bad day for no reason what so ever i would just really like to kill myself today. But everything is okay. I just hate the world today. He's up and playing merrily on his swing again so i'm going to make up some bottles once the water in the kettle has cooled down anyway so i think first i am going to have a cigarette. :)
I did have my breakfast in the end by the way i had cheerios and a cup of tea. Oh yeah, i drink tea now, we have Mike to thank lmao it all started because Mike said he bet i'd be drinking tea soon and i was like, nope i don't like tea never have never will lalalalala and then later the next day i decided i was going to make myself a cup of tea and taste it while he was at work SIMPLY to prove him wrong but damnit it backfired and turns out i actually do like tea. :) lolz! I feel abit better now i've changed my top but i still look like an ugly spotty chubby man, i'm just an ugly spotty chubby man in a nicer outfit. LOL. Turns out i boiled the kettle without actually turning the plug on... *looks sheepish* lol, not for my tea earlier but for Justins bottles lol. I didn't manage to get Jimmy out in the end i didn't have time so i will have to do it while Justin is up, unless he goes for a nap after his half two feed lol. Then again, i'm feeling a little off myself and think i may have to go for a nap when he does, lmao at my life. Right anyways i'm going to be off to look through my farmfoods leaflet thingy and play with Justin and make some bottles and do regular mommy things lol. :) ly all.

Wow today is going slowwwlyyyy. Rang my dad to ask if he would take me to farmfoods later but he can't because Eileen has a hospital appointment & then he's going to the villa lol so fair enough i guess, Justin is refusing to nap so he's sat next to me on his playmat. I don't think there's anything else i need to do at the moment now. :( boredom, i hate having nothing to do lol. Justins yawning away and chattering and playing at the same time haha and he just said dada again :) lol. and again. :) hehehehehehe. Think i'm going to try putting him to bed again in a moment lol but i'm having too much fun chattering with him at the min and i'm pretty sure he will protest if i put him to bed anyway lol. I think i'm going to check the bank and see how poor i am and then i am going to try and put Justin to bed and if he goes i may have a nap myself lol. He started screaming literally as i typed that so i've put him to bed now, this id the fun part where i wait five mins while he's screaming for him to fall asleep, he always falls asleep mid scream though so god knows what the people next door must think! Poor thing he's a funny little fella lol. I think i'm going to go and do the washing up while i wait for him to fall asleep, then again if he dosn't fall asleep then god knows lol. I don't know what i'm talking about now i'm just chattering on. Damn it why dosn't he sleep when he's tired, it makes no sense at all lol. He's not long been fed and changed and he's yawning and crying so i'm pretty damn sure he's tired lol, silly silly thing. When this song finishes i will check on him and then i will do the washing up and then i will check on him again and by then i imagine he will be asleep but if not then i will have to get him up, gosh how upsetting and confusing, for some reason i really can't think straight today i'm really skatterbrained lol. I'm trying to work out how the day has gone so far, he woke up at six, had his bottle and most of his rusk then we got up and played for abit then he went to bed around half 9? then he got up at ten for his bottle and he's been up since then because he refused to go back to sleep, whats the time now? its twenty to twelve so yeah, he really should have a nap now, he's still screaming mind. Okay i'll go check on him now he's probably dropped his dummy or something, poor thing. Okay well he's deffinately tired cuz he can hardly keep his eyes open lol he's still moaning mind, despite me giving him his dummy and shushing him and such ohhh, i think he's stopped now mind, no i was wrong, bless him lol. Right i'm going to do the washing up and then check on Justin and then do some other stuff so i won t be back untill later now, or perhaps tomorrow, i don't really know. lol.

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