The best way out is always through.

The best way out is always through. - Robert Frost.

11:17am.
A very short quote this morning but i like it. :) I only woke up about 15 mins ago I've had to rush to get dressed and such because Justin's jabs are this morning. In all fairness to me though i didn't get home until like 2:30am. Went to meet Mike & then we went to Kurtis' :) Had a lovelyyy nighttt. I haven't seen either of them in ages so it was really niceeeeeee. Like old timesss. Kurtis has afrooohairryyyjoyyy and it reminds me of a poodle and i love it. I missed them two. I must not leave it another 10 years before i see them again. lol. I think i left my wig cap at Kurtis' lol. Mike has a gig on Saturday that I'm going to actually so it wont be years before i see them again lol. :) & hopefully they're both coming out for my birthday but that is a while away. I'm thinking i might have to go out the Saturday after the Saturday after my birthday because HOPEFULLY according to the whole 8 weeks and such blah blah I'll have my money by then but it wont feel like much of a birthday celebration lol it would be on the 7th of February lol, more like Ami's birthday celebration... Unless she wants like a joint celebration thing & we can do it half way... Then again we always plan to do that lol. Oh well, I'll ask, there's no harm in that. I'm really excited to see Justin again. I missed him so much. I hate waking up in the morning/going to bed at night and seeing an empty moses basket. :( Got a text this morning at bout 8am telling me i have a total of 11p in the bank. What a wonderful way to start the morning. I can't believe this is going to take so long. It is truly depressing. I think i might maybe should be able to make things stretch though, i hope. I'm just worried that if i get a place i wont be able to afford, well, anything. I mean my dads agreed to let me pay him what i owe him in rent when my money all comes through but i can't exactly do that in like an official situation. Bummer. I'm waiting for so many things in the post and still nothing. I'm waiting for a form from child tax credits people. I'm waiting for a letter from child benefit telling me they've sent a letter to child tax credits to try and speed things along. I'm waiting for a letter from the bromford supported housing telling me what place i am in line. I'm waiting for a form from Solihull council for my homeless application. I'm waiting for a letter from the doctors telling me they've referred me to the newington center. I'm waiting for a letter from the newington center telling me when my appointment will be. I have a funny feeling I'm going to be waiting a while. I hope they all come BEFORE Christmas. When is the last postage date? the 22nd? when does it start again? hang on. I'll google it. *GOOGLE TO THE RESCUE* lol.

"Christmas Posting Dates
Last posting dates for Christmas 2008 have now been announced. Christmas is always busy for the posties and it’s best to try and ensure you post your cards and pressies early.

Last Xmas Posting Dates for 2008:

Second Class - Thursday 18th December
First Class - Saturday 20th December

Special Delivery:

Special Delivery (Standard Service) - Tuesday 23rd"


Sooner than i thought then. Not long left at all. Right I've decided, the 2nd of February is apparently the soonest I'm going to get my money so I'm going to make a counter and put it in the sidebar of my blog lol.


I'm so pissed off. today is the day we have to change Justin's teats. I told James about 2 weeks ago. So i asked him today if he had and.. no h hasn't even brought them yet! So i said FFS James and then he goes on saying that he's doing everything according to me and everything i want and he has no choice! I'm like, sorry, but this isn't according to me, this is according to what BABY'S NEED! and I've spoken to the fucking health visitor about it and everything but apparently its still just me trying to make things harder for him... I brought mine about 2 weeks ago and I've changed them this morning... Some people are so stupid. I don't think he will manage when he has a place of his own to have Justin in.

According to him I'm "piggy back riding off my dad" I'd like to know what on earth he means by that. Considering all I'm doing involving my dad is living here. I look after Justin. I pay for everything he needs. I do everything. Fucking piggyback riding off my dad. He can talk. I think maybe its finally time for him and his mom to cut the umbilical cord... if you know what i mean. LOL

I told him he needs the right teats to be able to have Justin and his reply was something about me having no right to stop him seeing his son, as if that was what i meant. I meant he needs to have the right teats. Maybe if he had spent this weekend with his son/thinking about his son. Instead of chilling with mates and a takeaway he'd have them already. also he was supposed to be here at 12, its 10 past.

13:18pm.
James is a prize cunt but i don't care because i have my little boy back. :D:D:D:D. The doctors given him some eye drops for his sticky eye because it wont go away no matter how often i wash it with warm water and cotton wool... Then again, i don't know if James is doing it over the weekends so that could be why. Idk. But he's got some eye drops now anyway. He's having a little nap after his jabs bless him the poor thing. I stayed it the room this time. It was horrible, the poor baby. He was ever so brave though he hardly cried at all. Poor thing. :( I was in bits. Nasty people hurting my little boy. lol. Just changed over all his teats :) lets see how much he vomits in ten mins. Yes ten mins because James can't stick to routine so he's now due a feed at half one. I'll get him back on tonight though. :) He's always so good with me, always sticking to his routine. I wonder why he doesn't with James. That isn't a dig by the way for anyone reading, I'm genuinely curious. Hmmm. Cuddle timeeeeeee peace & love. x

14:00pm.
Cutie bum has gone back down for a nap now bless him. I imagine he's a bit sleepy after his jabs. He got a bit excited with his feed because the milk was coming out faster and choked lol. Obviously he's okay otherwise I'd be having a mad panic, but it was cute lol. James text me saying something along the lines of I'm sorry i don't like it when we argue lol. I really just couldn't care less anymore. Damn its cold. Oh yeah, someone asked me why i put the quotes as the title of my blogs. Its because they inspire me/make me think/make me happy and I'd hoped they'd do the same for others. I only put certain quotes up. :) I have four tickets for Mike's gig so i hope everyone can come lol... Zoie & Kurt recon i should get with him... haha he has a girlfriend. Lol. I'm just sat around for an hourish now waiting for Lou to get her bum here. she's brought/is buying me a dress for Christmas bless her she's so lovelyyyy. :) I think i'm going to see Ami afterwards aswell. peace & love. x

14:22pm.
I'm thinking of selling my Nokia N95 to make money. So if you're interested get in touch. Also i've been advised (which i find quite amusing) To put a paypal donation thing on my blog so i shall try and see what that does lol. :) If i can work out how...

18:46pm.
Just put Justin to bed, its abit early i know but he had his feed abit early. He dosn't sound happy about it mind. Poor thing he had his Jabs today though so he's probably just a little upset. Poor thingg. Nothing much to blog about really. Saw Lou, went to Ami's saw Zoie had a merry mothers meeting, went home bathed Justin. Watched Charlie and Lola, fed Justin & put him to bed. Bless him. He's really going for it. Poor babbyy. Oh i missed him. :)

20:00pm.
I'm having my recording done tomorrow. I STILL don't know what i'm going to say. Hopefully Lou will come online tonight and help. lol.

22:55pm.
Come new year i am SERIOUSLY starting again. WITH EVERYTHING, i figure its a good enough time to do so. If you want to be in my life. Let me know. Obviously there's a fair few people i'd like to be in my life, but if you don't want to be, but don't want to say here's your chance to break free i guess. I'll be getting a new number and a new myspace and all that. Obviously hopefully soon i'll also be getting a new address. So, yeah.