Wednesday, 19 November 2008

To believe with certainty we must begin with doubting.

To believe with certainty we must begin with doubting. ~Stanislaus I of Poland

You know what i want, i want somebody nice. Someone romantic. Someone that wants to take care of me, even when i tell them i don't need them too. Someone that surprises me with little gestures, not flowers, that's too easy real things that really say "i care". Someone to cuddle up to and watch a DVD. Someone to take me out, i don't care where McDonald's would do just to get me out of the house for a bit. Someone that thinks I'm beautiful no matter what a state I'm in. Someone that wipes away my tears, not causes them. Someone to have big long in depth conversations with that
doesn't care how much i waffle on or don't make sense. Someone that doesn't pretend to automatically understand me, but actually tries to. Someone that when i ask them what they're thinking about they don't just say "you" because that's what they think i want to hear but actually answers the question. Someone that would never dream of doing anything to hurt me. Preferably someone attractive, i don't care if they're good in bed or anything like that, things can be learnt ;). I just want someone nice to come and sweep me off my feet.
Never going to happen right? I don't even think that person could ever exist.
Oh well, a girl can dream can't she.

So, Justin has this clown doll toy thing and it rocks back and forth and makes a tinkly noise, he loves it to bits, but I'm petrified of it lol, i hate clown dolls. He was really good last night slept from 7 till 4, woke up for a feed and slept until 9. I've just realised mind, that i am yet to post a picture of my little boy, so here we are. You can see his clown toy in that, but it doesn't show quite how frightening it is, he's fine with that but was scared of a little green frog rattle, poor thing. He's having a merry little kick about and a good old natter to his toys on the living room floor bless him, isn't he beautiful. I can't believe its been 10 weeks already. :) I got a text last night of a friend, he is the sweetest and most perfect bloke in the world, he is seriously lovely and he never fails to cheer me up but whenever i speak to him i can't help but think that he is too good to be true, and in my experience if something seems too good to be true, it probably is, which is a shame really. He has a girlfriend anyway, not that I'm looking for any kind of a relationship at the moment, I'd say its probably years too soon for that lol.

Right now I'm really loving Nickelback's new album, i can't even name my favorite tracks because every time i hear a new one it becomes my favorite but i particularly like I'd come for you and If today was your last day, trust me to pick the soppy ones out of a Nickelback album. Me and Justin having been listening to it all morning well we were until he got tired so I've put him down to bed now :) Got to take him to the baby clinic down the road at 2pm, i think that's when it starts anyway going to talk to the health visitor about his milk because i want to start putting him onto sma white, so we will see how that goes. I have a UKYP (United Kingdom Youth Parliament) meeting later well at about half past 6 so that should be nice, providing i can get the car seat into the taxi that is. Otherwise I'm pretty bollocked really. I just found the most wonderful website its called 43 things and you set yourself a list of goals and write entries about them, (how you're doing and stuff) and people cheer you on and give you support. It really is fantastic, kudos to whoever thought of it, the links in the side panel now underneath my myspace link. I'm trying to think of things that i could do to make this blog better/more interesting/attract more readers so if you have any suggestions, feel free to let me know.

Took Justin to the clinic today, the health visitor agrees with me about changing his milk, thank god & he weighs 13 pounds and 11 ounces!!!!!! He's huge. Bless him, he decided it would be a good idea to wee all over his body suit and vest so i changed him into his spare one and he vomited all over it, what a good boy :) lol. Bless him though he's amazing. Had my first UKYP meeting today, it was fantastic, even if i don't win its already been such a lovely experience, everyone so nice and friendly. I'd like to be able to say I've made some new friends already. :) Having Loulabelle come over soon to help me with what on earth I'm going to say on my campaign video thing, i have no clue. Well i do, i can generalise it but I've not managed to put it into sentences yet. Hopefully Lou will help with that.

Comment if you read it. :)
I like to know I'm appreciated.


  1. Jess - thanks for dropping by my blog, I'm glad I was able to inspire you... I'm just a first-time mom, like you, but with some different circumstances and I'm learning as I go.

    Your little boy is gorgeous... keep on loving him with all your heart and everything else will work out eventually.

  2. Congrats on your little one! Your baby is beautiful:) Don't worry someday you will find that right one:) Best wishes!!